When A Relationship Ends, Where Do The Memories Go?

One of the hardest parts of the "healing" and "moving forward" process when a relationship ends is being left with the memories. Even if you are not thinking of them, the memories can come up at anytime when reminded of a moment or experience with them. Whether you are driving down a street and pass a restaurant you went on a date, remember a conversation or funny moment, the memories are often the continued and unexpected reminders of the end of something that was once an enjoyable part of your life.

What's unfair about memories is that they can come up at anytime. We don't have to look for them, they can come up when you smell something that reminds you of a them, a song you danced to together, even seeing the listing of a movie on Netflix that you went on a date with them to see.

It can feel as if no matter how much you try not to think of them, the memories keep you from freeing your thoughts of what used to be. We can't "run" from the memories, so the question is, what do we do with them?

The best way to move on from memories is to remove the connection attached to them. Start removing attachments that connect to memories, such as reclaiming streets you can't go down without thinking of a memory as intentionally seeing it only as that streets name. That song you both played over and over again can be removed as a memory by looking up the singers reason for writing it so a new connection is made. Reclaim insightful conversations that you’ve had as simply the wise words shared and removing the person behind them.

One by one, take each memory back and remove the connection. Remove them until they don't hurt or make you wish you both were together again. Remove each thing that reminds you of them until you simply see it as either a distant memory that was once a good time, or until there is simply no special meaning because you've taken the memories connection away completely.