Wait For The Relationship Gods Anointed You For

The saying that we are in a time that has “microwave” culture mentality that seeks instant gratification and results is incredibly true. We desire what we want now, even if it does not take into account if what we want now will fit into our years to come. The problem with dating with an "instant gratification" mindset is that we have no idea what the future holds and if the one we are dating to fulfill our current needs will be anointed for our future selves and everything that time will require them to be.

If you look back at the type of relationship or partner you desired during various ages and seasons, you may find that what you once wanted is no longer the type of person you seek. There may even be a few that are down right cringe worthy. In high school, at the top of my list was a boy that was on the football team so that I could wear his letter jacket on days of home games (that never happened fyi). My college sweetheart made me feel so incredibly special by giving me a promise ring, making me the first of my friends to wear such "grown up" statement of commitment. By my post college years my standards changed to desiring men that were focused on their careers, only to shift in my 30s to changing my perspective to have an appreciation for men that were more family focused. My “wants” have changed through the years and I am confident that they will continue to as I move through various seasons. Not only will my wants change, but the needs and anointing required for each season will shift too. Imagine if that dream boyfriend that I desired in high school for the sole purpose of wearing his letter jacket was the same one that I expected to meet me in seasons that I didn’t even have the capacity to prepare for myself. My temporary and needs at that time were incredibly immature and did not have any substance to evolve through many seasons. When we think of having an “instant gratification” mindset even as adults, it’s not much different than our childlike desires we had in our teens. If we simply are excited to meet someone to have our dream wedding, to travel with, encourage as we build in our careers or to enjoy nights in for “Netflix and Chill”, then our desires have only become more adult, but are still just as limited. We aren’t taking into consideration those things that life can unexpectedly bring. Are we considering what would happen if faced with an unexpected health issue, infertility, financial challenges, even if they battle with mental health issues like depression?

Moving through life with someone else is anything but easy. We have no idea what the future holds, and the last thing we want is to not be anointed for it. I recently spoke to a friend that is dealing with a heartbreaking diagnosis of their child. As hard as this diagnosis is, she is comforted in knowing God wouldn’t have chosen her family if he didn’t think they could handle it. When we are rushing Gods hand by asking to comfort our current needs by hurrying to send our future husbands, we are bypassing taking the time to ensure we are prepared for not just this season, but a lifetime of ups and downs with the same person.

The last thing you want is to feel "I didn't sign up for all this" when hit with relationships unexpected challenges. Don’t become so tired of waiting and praying to meet the one God has for you that you decide to go about it your own way and marry the one that fulfills your loneliness and impatience, opposed to the one that fulfills Gods will. You may find yourself married to someone that you end up miserable with because marriage was not what you imagined with them at all. The truth is, marriage will be hard even for the one God anointed us for. The difference is that he will give us the grace needed as he knew when he joined you what you both would need to be anointed for. It's like the biblical story Sarah found in the book of Genesis. Sarah was promised a child by God and laughed at the thought (Genesis 18:12).

Not only did she laugh, but her husband Abraham did as well (Genesis 17: 17). Their laughter was understandable considering they had 2 strikes against them- Sarah was barren and both were old, like 90 years old, old. While the stacks were against them, God still promised that they would be parents. Here’s the part of the story where I would probably pull a Sarah. Homegirl decided to take matters into her own hands by having her servant, Hagar, have a child with Abraham (Genesis 16:2). Well, not only did Hagar have a child, Ishmael, but so did Sarah! Just as God promises she would. While God still blessed Ishmael, the servants child, since he was not the chosen and anointed child that Sarah and Abraham was promised, he never received the same level of blessing as his brother, Issac (Genesis 17:21)

I like to call situations that you attempt to take into your own has as an Ishmael. Pray against creating an Ishmael situation where you attempt to take matters into your own hands. Pray for patience and to wait on Gods timing for those things that he has promised. God has shown through Sarah and Abrahams story that while even those things we take into our own hands can receive his blessings and favor as Ishmael received, they will never receive the level of favor that your Issac, or promise, will receive. Even though Sarah laughed and took matters into her own hands, she was blessed with a son and professed that whatvonce MADE her laugh, BROUGHT her laughter (Genesis 21: 6)

Everything you've gone through will prepare you for the one you were anointed for. Remove the need for instant gratification and trust in God’s timing, believing he has not forgotten and will bless you with the one perfect person. Wait for your Issac and believe God will fulfill the promise he has placed in your heart.

Photo Credit: Agung Pandit Wiguna